Sadly, I'm pretty clueless when it comes to horses. They just don't respect my authority.
Maybe that's my problem... A lack of authority.
It's not my fault. I just never got the chance to learn.
A few weeks ago I went riding with a friend who has a whole bunch of horses.
There are things you have to do before you go riding.
For me, first and foremost, you must take your Claritin. It really is an essential step for survival. Horses don't much like sneezing maniacs on their backs. Well, at least I don't think they do. I pretty much just made that up.
Next, it's always a good idea to start in on a little kissing up to your horse... A little pep talk if you will.
This is Dorado. I'm asking him to please try to put out of his mind our past incidents. Like when I attempted to get on him and wound up with the saddle sideways on his back, me laying on the ground under him, and my sandals dangling from the stirrups.
Then, you have to prepare them for saddling. This requires brushing.
Finally, the saddles go on.
And we ride off into the sun...
I SAID... we ride off into the sun...
... very... slowly...
In the horses' defense, it was a really hot day, the flies were terrible, and frankly I just don't exude confidence when working with horses.
Dorado really does know what's up when somebody who knows what they're doing is on him.